The Miseducation of Class Xth F – Part II

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For Part One Click Here

Unsure and impatient the whole class was itching to hear Walker Sir’s story. Questions flew thick and fast in our minds : Was it a real story? Would there be an actual kiss? And if there was would he really tell all? Whatever the case, we would know soon enough…but only after Bhupesh Shah, the third monitor of the class returned from the staff room Bhupesh, one of the thirty seven Shah’s in our class was in fact the perfect guy for the job. Considering that he was Jayachandran Geometry Madam’s favourite student it was highly unlikely that he wouldn’t be able to convince her not to come to class.

Gasping for air, he straightened his tie and flattened his heavily oiled hair, while scanning the staff room for Jayachandran Geometry Ma’am. At first there was no sign of her but soon enough Bhupesh spotted the diminutive teacher almost fully hidden behind a pile of uncorrected notebooks. Bhupesh gathered his courage and walked towards her as she furiously made huge red crosses on every page of a notebook, before finally slamming it shut.

“Eh..excuse Mees” Bhupesh stuttered as she absent-absentmindedly looked up.

“Not now I’m busy!” she said barely making eye-contact. Determined not to give up, Bhupesh decided to get straight to the point.

“Mees, you can’t take extra class today.” he announced.

“What naansense!” thundered Jayachandran Ma’am.

“Yes Mees, that Walker Sir is there no, he is only saying this way.” explained a harried Bhupesh. “He is telling me to telling you that today he is taking surprise PT exam Mees.”

“PT is yoosless! Whaat you will learn from Left-Right-Left? You go back and tell him that Jayachandran Madam said that Maths is more important!”she ordered.

“But Mees he is saying….” Bhupesh tried to argue

“Shameless! Back-answering to your teachers! Is this what Mummy-Daddy taught you?” she slapped him.

“Sorry Mees” said Bhupesh with a lone tear running down his cheek. Seeing her pet weep melted Jayachandran Madam’s heart usual. She finally gave in.

“Okay okay, now don’t cry. Fine you go tell Walker Sir that he can take class today, but no PT period for the next two weeks! I have to finish Trigonometry Group D after all!”

“Yes yes, thenk you mees. I will telling!” said Bhupesh gleefully wiping his tears away. He then turned and ran back to class twice as fast as before with an ear-to-ear grin pasted on his face. In no time he reached class door and outstretched an arm.

“Pliss may I come in Sir.” he said.

“Huh…where did you come from? You were bunking? Shameless!” Walker Sir grumbled, having obviously forgotten that he himself had sent Bhupesh to the staff room.

“No no Sir, you are only sending me remember?” reminded Bhupesh.

“Uh…of course I remember? Tumko kya lagta hai, Walker Sir tight hai?” chuckled a very drunk Walker sir. “Chal come in and sit down. Haan to you know what, I was thinking that I will tell all of you a story today”

“Sir you already told us that!” the class reminded in chorus

“Accha? Oh haan yes… Kya bol raha tha main…hmm haan yaad aaya. Chalo Saavdhan!” he barked again as the class once again sat a right angle to the bench.

“Hmm bahut saal pehle ka story hai. Main tumhare jaise Tenth standard mein thaa.” recounted Walker Sir dreamily as we hung on to every word he said. “My school was also all-boys…but there was a girls’ school just five minutes away from ours.” he winked.

“Main to seedha saadha thaa tabhi, but my friend Halkat Pinto, well he was called Halkat for a reason hehe. Saala, how many times he got caned by the nuns for whistling outside their gate! But kabhi nahi sudhra woh” chuckled Walker sir reminiscently. “But as they say na, Allah Meherbaan to Gadha pehelwaan! Our Halkat donkey also had fate on his side. Saala whistle kar kar ke he managed to patao one girl, you know? And not just any girl, sabse in-demand item – Julie!” Sensing that the class was starting to lose patience, he decided to get to the point quicker. “Accha haan, woh sab chodo, haan to hamare farewell ki raat thi. Program wogram ke baad, we all decided to go seek the Old Monk’s blessings…you know thoda daaru-shaaru.” he winked again

“But Halkat said he couldn’t come along. Bola aaj kuch aur plan hai. We thought, saala of all the people Halkat is saying no to daaru! So main usko kopche mein leke gaya and asked him what was the scene. At first he wouldn’t say anything, par maine insist kiya.”

“See if anyone akses, don’t tell haan. Or I’ll bloody bajao you!” Halkat warned me. “Julie’s there no, I’m calling her over tonight.”

“Abey saale, what if your parents catch you.” I asked in shock.

“Don’t worry men. All the settings is done. My folks na, they’re gone to Goa for the weekend men!” Halkat boasted . “Now chal haan, I’ll make a move. Julie will get angry and all if I come late. I’ll tell you the details baad mein okay men?”

“And so saying Halkat sped off for his night with Julie as me and my friends stared in disbelief.” said Walker Sir

“Then what happen, Sir?” inquired Bhupesh curiously.

“Well, the next afternoon Halkat called me and he sounded very worried.” Walker Sir continued

“Bloody I’m screwed men!” wept Halkat. “Totally jacked-up men, totally!”

To be continued…

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3 thoughts on “The Miseducation of Class Xth F – Part II

  1. Entertaining.

    Especially the jayachandran mees part.

    Halkat Pinto as a name is slightly over used, not in your story but generally… I think.

    But ishtill it waaz good.

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